This is the continuation of sharing the things I highlighted in the book. No copyright infringement intended. Just want to share this for people who don't have the patience to finish the whole book but interested to have more than a glimpse of the book.
DAY 17. A Place to Belong
We are called to belong, not just believe.
We are created for community, fashioned for fellowship, and formed for a family, and none of us can fulfill God's purposes by ourselves.
We are members of his Body---the church.
Being a "member" of the church meant being a vital organ of a living body, an indispensable, interconnected part of the Body of Christ.
The Bible calls the church "the bride of Christ" and "the body of Christ." God commands as to love the church as mush as Jesus does. "Love your spiritual family."
Reasons why we need a Church Family:
✅A church family identifies you as a genuine believer
✅A church family moves you out of self-centered isolation
✅A church family moves you develop spiritual muscle
✅The Body of Christ needs you
✅You will share in Christ's mission in the world
✅A church family will help you keep from backsliding
God created the CHURCH to MEET your 5 DEEPEST NEEDS:
✅A purpose to live for
✅People to live with
✅Principles to live by
✅Profession to live out
✅Power to live on
God's purposed for his church are identical to his 5 PURPOSES for you:
✅Worship helps you focus on God
✅Fellowship helps you face life's problems
✅Discipleship helps fortify your faith
✅Ministry helps find your talents
✅Evangelism helps fulfill your mission
The difference between being a church attender and a church member is commitment. Attenders are spectators from sidelines, members gets INVOLVED in the ministry.
God wants us to love real people, not ideal people.
DAY 18. Experiencing Life Together (I've read this on my husband's birthday last year and realized that the closest fellowship is MARRIAGE and this chapter is so helpful for married Christian couples 😍)
Life is meant to be shared.
God intends for us to experience life together. The Bible calls this shared experience fellowship.
When it comes to fellowship, size matters: Smaller is better.
💕In real fellowship, people experience AUTHENTICITY.
It is genuine, heart-to-heart, sometimes gut-level sharing. It happens when people get honest about who they are and what is happening in their lives. They share their hurts, disclose their doubts, admit their fears, acknowledge their weaknesses, and ask for HELP and PRAYER.
Being authentic requires both COURAGE and HUMILITY.
We only grow by taking risks, and the most difficult risk of all is to be honest with ourselves and with others.
💕In real fellowship, people experience MUTUALITY. Mutuality is the art of giving and forgiving. It's depending on each other. It is the HEART of fellowship: building reciprocal relationships, sharing responsibilities, and helping each other.
💕In real fellowship, people experience SYMPATHY. Sympathy is entering in and sharing the pain of others. It meets 2 fundamental human needs: the need to be UNDERSTOOD and the need to have your feelings VALIDATED. Every time you understand and affirm someone's feelings, you build FELLOWSHIP.
Different levels of fellowship:
Simplest: fellowship of sharing and studying God's Word together
Deeper: fellowship of serving
Deepest, most intense: fellowship of suffering where we enter into each other's pain and grief and carry each other's burdens
💕In real fellowship, people experience MERCY. Fellowship is a PLACE OF GRACE, where mistakes aren't rubbed in but rubbed out. Fellowship happens when mercy wins over justice.
You can't have fellowship without FORGIVENESS. God warns, "Never hold grudges," because bitterness and resentment destroy fellowship.
Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
Forgiveness is letting go of the past. TRUST has to do with future behavior. Trust must be rebuilt overtime. It required a track record. If someone hurts you repeatedly, you are commanded by God to forgive them instantly, but you are not expected to trust them immediately, and you are not expected to continue allowing them to hurt you.
DAY 19. Cultivating Community
Community requires COMMITMENT.
✅Cultivating community takes HONESTY
The Bible tells us to "speak the truth in love".
"An honest answer is a sign of true friendship." but "Never use harsh words when you correct...".
The tunnel of conflict is the passageway to intimacy in any relationship. Until you CARE ENOUGH to confront and resolve the underlying barriers, you will never grow close to each other. When conflict is handled correctly, we grow closes to each other by facing and resolving our differences.
Frankness is not a license to say anything you want. It is not rudeness. ❌
Thoughtless wounds leave lasting wounds.
✅Cultivating community takes HUMILITY
Prides build walls between people ❌, humility builds bridges.
Humility is the oil that smooths and soothes relationship.
Pride blocks God's grace in our lives.
Develop humility in very practical ways:
✔by admitting your weaknesses
✔by being patient with other's weaknesses
✔by open to correction
✔by pointing the spotlight on other
Paul wrote "Give more honor to others than yourselves."
✅Cultivating community takes COURTESY
Courtesy is RESPECTING our differences, being CONSIDERATE of each other's feelings, and being patient with people who irritate us.
One key to courtesy is to understand where people are coming from. Discover their history.
✅Cultivating community takes CONFIDENTIALITY
Only in the safe environment of warm acceptance and trusted confidentiality will people open up their deepest hurts, needs, and mistakes.
God hates gossip ❌, especially when it is thinly disguised as a "prayer request" for someone else. Gossip always causes hurt and divisions.
✅Cultivating community takes FREQUENCY
Relationships take TIME. You have to spend time with people--a lot of time--to build deep relationships.
Fellowship requires an investment of time.
DAY 20. Restoring Broken Fellowship
Relationships are always worth restoring.
Life is all about learning how to LOVE.
How to restore a relationship:
💟Talk to God before talking to the person
💟Always take the initiative
💟Sympathize with their feelings
💟Confess your part of the conflict
💟ATTACK THE PROBLEM, NOT THE PERSON
💟Cooperate as much as possible
💟Emphasize RECONCILIATION, not resolution
We can disagree without being disagreeable.
God expects UNITY, not uniformity, and we can walk arm-in-arm without seeing eye-to-eye on every issue.
God calls peacemakers his children.
DAY 21. Protecting Your Church (This is equivalent for me in marriage protecting your spouse)
UNITY is the soul of fellowship.
Our supreme model for unity is the Trinity. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are completely unified as one. God himself is the highest example of sacrificial love, humble other-centeredness, and perfect harmony.
✅Focus on what we have in common, not our differences
✅Be REALISTIC in your expectations
✅Choose to encourage rather than criticize
✅Refuse to listen to gossip
✅Practice God's method for conflict resolution
3 Steps:
✔Go directly to the person involved. Private confrontation is always the 1st step, and you should take it ASAP.
✔Take on or two witnesses to help confirm the problem and reconcile the relationship
✔Take it to church
✅Support your pastor and leaders
The truth is, everyone needs and wants to be loved, and when people find a church where members GENUINELY LOVE and CARE for each other, you would have to lock the doors to keep them away.
DAY 22. Purpose #3: Created to Become Like Christ
Like God, we are spiritual beings, intellectual, relational, and we have moral consciousness.
God wants his children to bear his image and likeness too. But as creatures, we will never be the Creator. God doesn't want you to become a god; he wants you to become godly--taking on his values, attitudes, and character.
God's ULTIMATE GOAL for your life on earth is not comfort, but CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT.
Christlikeness is all about transforming your character, not your personality.
Life is supposed to be difficult! It's what enables us to grow. Remember, earth is not heaven!
God is not your servant. ❌
Never forget that life is not about you! You exist for God's purposes, not vice versa.
God gives us our time on earth to build and strengthen our character for heaven.
Christlikeness is not produce by imitation, but by inhabitation. We allow Christ to live through us. Through the choices we make. We choose to do the right thing in situations and trust God's Spirit to give us his power, love, faith, and wisdom to do it.
✅We must COOPERATE with the Holy Spirit's work
The Holy Spirit releases his power the moment you take a step of faith.
OBEDIENCE unlocks God's power.
3 Responsibilities in becoming like Christ:
✔we must choose to let go of our old ways of acting
✔we must change the way we think
✔we must "put" on the character of Christ by developing new, godly habits
✅God uses his Word, people, and circumstances to mold us
All three are indispensable for character development. God's Word provides the truth we need to grow, God's people provide the support we need to grow, and circumstances provide the environment we need to practice Christlikeness.
Remember, it's all about LOVE--loving God and loving others.
✅Becoming like Christ is a long, slow process of growth.
You are a work in progress.
God is far more interested on what you are than what you do because you will take your character into eternity.
DAY 23. How We Grow
Spiritual growth is an intentional commitment. You must want to grow, decide to grow, make an effort to grow, and persist in growing.
Discipleship--the process of becoming like Christ--always begin with a decision.
We become whatever we are committed to.
Every choice has eternal consequences, so you had better choose wisely.
✅God's part and your part.
✅Changing your autopilot--the way you think
"Be careful how you think, your life is shaped by your thoughts."
The way you think determines the way you feel, and the way you feel influences the way you act.
Selfish thinking is the source of sinful behavior.
Christianity is a relationship and a lifestyle. The core of that lifestyle is thinking of others.
Thinking of others is the heart of Christlikeness and the best evidence of spiritual growth.
DAY 24. Transformed by Truth
Spiritual growth is the process of replacing lies with truth.
Sanctification requires revelation.
God's Word is alive. Never take it for granted!
God's Word is the spiritual nourishment you must have to fulfill your purpose.
3 Activities in abiding God's Word:
✅I must accept its authority
✅I must assimilate its truth
✅I must apply its principles
DAY 25. Transformed by Trouble
God has a purpose behind every problem.
God uses problems to draw you closer to himself.
Problems force us to look to God and depend on him instead of ourselves.
You'll never know that GOD IS ALL YOU NEED until God is all you've got.
Everything that happens to a child of God is Father-filtered.
Everything that happens to you has a spiritual significance.
We live in a fallen world. Only in heaven is everything done perfectly the way God intends.
Responding to problems as Jesus would:
✅Remember that God's plan is good. God knows what is best for you and has your best interests at heart.
✅Rejoice and give thanks. God is going through the pain with us.
✅Refuse to give up. Don't give up--grow up!
DAY 26. Growing through Temptation
Every temptation is an opportunity to do good.
Temptation simply provides the choice.
Every time we choose to do good instead of sin, you are growing in the character of Christ.
Fruit of the Spirit: Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. To have the fruit of the Spirit is to be like Christ.
We learn REAL PEACE by choosing to trust God in circumstances in which we are tempted to worry or be afraid (REMIND YOURSELF ALWAYS OF THIS ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A WORRYWORM LIKE ME 🙏)
God uses the opposite of each fruit to allow us a choice. You can't claim to be good if you've never been tempted to be bad.
Every time you defeat a temptation, you become more like Jesus!
HOW TEMPTATION WORKS (all temptations follow the same pattern):
👹Satan identify a desire inside you
The desire to be loved and valued or to feel pressure. Temptation starts when Satan suggests (with a thought) that you give in to an evil desire, or that you fulfill a legitimate desire in a wrong way or at the wrong time. Always beware of shortcuts!
Temptation begins within us. Temptation always starts in your mind. James tell us that there is "a whole army of evil desires within you."
👹Satan tries to get you doubt what God has said about the sin.
👹Deception. Satan is incapable of telling the truth and is called "the Father of lies."
👹Disobedience. What began as an idea gets birthed into behavior. Sin, when full-grown, gives birth to death.
Specific steps in OVERCOMING TEMPTATION:
😇Refuse to be intimidated
😇Recognize your pattern of temptation and be prepared for it
😇Request God's help
God's love is everlasting and his patience endures forever.
Come boldly. Ask him for the power to do the right thing and then expect him to provide it.
Temptations keep us dependent upon God. 🙏
DAY 27. Defeating Temptations
There is always a way out.
God has promised never to allow more on you than he puts within you to handle.
4 Biblical keys to defeating temptation:
✅Refocus your attention on something else
✅Reveal your struggle to a godly friend or support group
✅Resist the Devil
✔First step is to accept God's salvation
✔Second is use the Word of God as your weapon
✅Realize your vulnerability
DAY 28. It Takes Time
There are no shortcuts to maturity.
God is concerned about how strong we grow. God views our lives from and for eternity, so he is never in a hurry.
God is more interested in strength and stability than swiftness.
Growth is gradual.
WHY DOES IT TAKE SO LONG?
✔We are slow learners
✔We have a lot to unlearn
✔We are afraid to humbly face the truth about ourselves
✔Habits take time to develop
WAYS TO COOPERATE WITH GOD IN THE PROCESS:
✅Believe God is working in your life even when you don't feel it
✅Keep a notebook or a journal of lessons learned
✅Be patient with God and with yourself
✅Don't get discouraged
Remember how far you've come.
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